This week, the issue of driver comfort has finally been forcibly pushed come to the fore of our minds. Thus far, we have had to prioritize survival over comfort – but now that the many cycles of testing and fixing are almost over (at least, in Cambridge), the majority of the mortality issues have been dealt with, and we can get on with keeping our drivers happy as well as alive. 

Ever since Kento jumped out of the Ford environmental test chamber after an hour of blazing sunshine at 45 degrees, it has been dawning slowly on many of us that this might not be Okay. Drivers in Australia are expected to be exposed to approximately the same amount of heat as given off by a hairdryer*! In fact, it turns out that the only discernible difference between Endeavour’s interior and a sauna is the absence of other sweaty men. After the ordeal, SunSpot spoke to Kento, who described the conditions as:

“Very hot.”

As the Outback Survival Officer (would you believe), it is my job to sort this issue and make sure that the driver is properly cooled and hydrated throughout the race. Quite a lot rides on this – if not appropriately taken care of, there is a real risk that the driver may spontaneously combust (either literally or figuratively). This would lead to further problems, in that the lithium-polymer batteries do not react well to fire (or, more accurately, attempts to extinguish said fire). Neither does the shell, as was discovered by the electrical team after a cock-up series of important tests.

Although driver replacement is relatively easy (we will be carrying spares), the failed component is likely to have damaged other, more critical parts of the car. We will have neither spare batteries nor a spare shell, and it is therefore crucial that we take care of the ones that we have. 

To the untrained eye, the sophisticated cooling-rehydration system appears to be nothing more than a bottle of water and a small fan. However, the design is constantly being refined, and by the time it is installed will have developed into two bottles of water and a bigger fan an efficient but vital driver comfort system. 

Heat, however, is not the only barrier to comfort that our drivers will face. The state of the seat left a lot to be desired. It should perform its function marvellously – protecting the driver from potential shrapnel shooting up from the front-wheel area. But it’s not particularly comfy – in the same way that armour plating and giant spikes are great defensive mechanisms, but you wouldn’t want them on the inside of the tank as well. Kevlar is not a material that was designed for its agreeable squishiness on the buttocks, and it’s beginning to show (well – not literally. The drivers’ buttocks are entirely their own business). 

For those readers out there who have been living under a rock without internet access (or, alternatively, anywhere else without internet access), the seat with the driver sitting inside it most commonly puts you in mind of a comic cartoon hospital bed – one that inexplicably has been designed to fold in half whenever an inept but well-meaning companion fiddles with the controls. Instant eco-sandwich. 

The gang of clever but remarkably environmentally unfriendly engineers down at Full Blue was faced with a similar problem, and solved it, as most do, with generous helpings of expanding foam. 

This substance surely needs no introduction. The name itself just dares you to microwave it and see what explodes. Disappointingly, it comes in two very sensible-looking tins, rather than the hugely comical and comically huge Silly-String-esque cans one would expect. On the whole, this was probably a good thing, given the habit developed by certain CUER members of putting things in other people’s ears. The fries were funny, the resin was…sticky, and the polyfiller was inconvenient – but at least there was never any danger of them swelling up to fill your entire ear canal and then charging your eardrum with all the force (and blind persistence) of the Light Brigade. Although – if it made it down the eustachian tube, the hilarious sight of yellow foam emerging from the victim’s nose, in much the same manner as playdoh spaghetti, could well make it worth the subsequent litigation. 

But enough of aural eco-mishaps. Enter the Watt Brothers**. In charge of turning two tins of squelchy chemicals into a beautifully ergonomic seat ‘cushion’, this comedy duo soon proceeded to Blue Peter their way into ineptitude. But, dear reader, do not be too critical. Even after a specialist (read: ‘chemist’ – or, as Mike likes to describe him, ‘barely chemist’) was brought in to assist with the not-really-that-arduous task of mixing the stuff that needed to be mixed, it was still obvious to many bystanders that it was missing those crucial components of both expansion and foaminess. CUER is, however, proud to announce the discovery of a new material: Sloshing-About Gunk. 

After more pouring, and mixing, and mockery, the foam was finally properly poured and expanded, and then Mike sat on it, while it expanded some more. This is the closest thing to heated seats Endeavour is ever going to have. Meanwhile, Mike was gratified to discover that all those years spent sitting still and doing very little were finally paying off. Around him, the busyness continued unabated. Lucy’s occasional attempts to tickle Mike and Charlie’s attempts at drilling through his feet were not well received. Still, if Endeavour never makes it as a solar car, she’ll always have a career as some form of restraint and torture device. The Aluminium Maiden, perhaps…

During this time of foaming expansion, there was much going on elsewhere. Jonathan finished ‘bomb-proofing’ the motor, as he puts it, and started work on designing and building a small circuit to control the indicators. This week CUER has also had a Special Guest Appearance by Will Wyckham the Jedi. It turns out the nickname derives from the fact that he is immensely good with software, rather than because he is a huge Star Wars anorak. It also turns out that he’s extremely good at croquet, as was discovered during one of the now-common CUER extended dinners at Queens. Ben and Hannah beat the front forks with various objects until they did as they were told, and Laura spent most of her evening inside the canopy with a Dremel.

Through this all, Mike sat. 

After the allotted time was up, he wriggled out of the chassis to reveal a drivers’ seat that turned out to be marginally less comfortable than the original Kevlar. A more hilarious imprint cannot be found in any unattended concrete the world over. 

Laura has since modified the seat using a much simpler and more commonly used technique known in engineering circles as Putting Cushions Down. This has been much more successful. 

The entire above exercise has since been revealed to be nothing more than a thinly veiled excuse to play with expanding foam. We’ve got an awful lot of it left. SunSpot therefore proposes a contest! Suggestions as to what to do with it all should be sent to soc-cuer-banter@lists.cam.ac.uk. The winning idea will receive the amount of expanding foam required to generate as much power as a hairdryer. 

  That’s all for today, eco-fans. Keep it Green! 

*If the hairdryer were eight light-minutes away, swelled to 4000000000000000000000000000000 times its mass and spontaneously underwent nuclear fusion.

**Placed somewhere between the Marx Brothers and the Blues Brothers on a scale of comedy value.